Management of the Non-Profit Organizations Research Proposal

Management of the Non-Profit Organizations - Research Proposal Example NPOs, on the other hand, do not usually provide for substantial monetary compensation, since most, if not all, of its work force are volunteers. As such, workers are motivated more by their love and dedication to the mission of the organization and the cause for which it stands. Because of this fundamental difference, workers in NPOs cannot be persuaded to remain with the organisation and contribute their best by the usual means of increasing pay and monetary incentives. Although volunteers are drawn to the job because of the psychic income, such may not be sufficient to sustain the commitment of these volunteers in the long term, without the necessary and appropriate support and action by the human resources manager. The threats posed by the social and physical environment on the continued commitment of an NPO’s volunteer staff will remain a source of challenge to its HR managers, which this dissertation shall aim to explore. Introduction Not too long ago, there was a clear d ichotomy of organizations according to their nature and purpose. The common taxonomy of organizations distinguished them according to whether they were business corporations, organizations supporting philanthropic causes or social development purposes, or public administrative organizations. Business organizations worked to maximize profit, public administrative organizations advanced the goals of the government, and the social cause-oriented organizations worked towards the development of marginalized sectors of society. Recently, there has emerged a changing trend in how organizations are expected to operate. Business organizations can no longer be motivated by the single goal of realizing profits; it must actively pursue a corporate social responsibility program and sustainability program integrally with its main operations, in order to return to society a portion of its profits for the benefits it enjoys as corporate citizen. Non-profit organizations, on the other hand, are comp elled to face the necessity of operating on a self-sustaining basis; it can no longer rely on its previous sponsors and donors who had so generously supported it during more prosperous times, because of the deep financial crisis that will continue to defy recovery efforts for some time to come. Even as many business organizations have been forced to close, NPOs, because of their less financially tenable position, are forced to face economic realities and find ways and means to become financially self-sustaining. There are implications to the obscuring delineations between the types of organizations. Business organizations are becoming increasingly socially oriented, while NPOs are assuming activities that are increasingly economic. These affect the manner in which human resources are expected to perform and how they are engaged. Conceptual framework The term employee engagement may immediately be considered a misnomer in the sense that NPO workers are mostly volunteers rather than e mployees. As such, they are normally not bound by an employment contract where they commit to discharge a particular set of duties in exchange for a predefined monetary compensation. NPO workers perform their duties of their own accord and volition, and correspondingly excel in these duties out of a sense of dedication to further the cause of the organization. Granted that there exists already a greater affinity and identity

Gender and Cultural Differences in Communication Essay

Gender and Cultural Differences in Communication - Essay Example Verbal communication is best used to convey particular information and is especially suited for communication via technology and over longer distances. Non-verbal communication, on the other hand, is immediate compared to the former. This causes its meaning to be more ambiguous, despite the fact that various non-verbal communication forms, for example, the use of eyes and hand gestures, have the ability to convey the emotions with more effectiveness than verbal communication can. Various technological communication media such as a film can also convey many forms of non-verbal communication. Verbal Gender and Cultural Differences During verbal communication, men will normally tend to give solutions, whereas women will tend to focus more on empathy. This mirrors the fact that women are more oriented towards solidifying relationships while men in most occasions are more goal-oriented. Differences in communication across the gender divide also extend to non-verbal communication. Various gestures may be decoded one way by a man and differently by a woman. Persons from various cultures also differ in their manner of expression, even when the words and their literal meanings are translated to the listener’s native language. In some cultures, the word â€Å"yes† could really mean â€Å"maybe† while in another culture, â€Å"yes† could be considered a commitment that is binding. Women are usually better at the interpretation of non-verbal means of communication compared to men. Men also tend to be less accomplished when it comes to sending non-verbal and subtle messages.

The cask of amontillado Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 250 words

The cask of amontillado - Essay Example Jealousy and pride are two of the most basic human traits that it oftentimes drives a person to murder as an act of revenge upon the person whom one feels has bested him, as in the case of Montresor and the unfortunately named Fortunato. As indicated in the opening statement of the story â€Å"The thousand injuries of Fortunato I had borne as I best could, but when he ventured upon insult I vowed revenge.† (Poe 743). Within the context of the story, we can see that Montresor feels that Fortunato has made a fool of him many times and has thus, hurt his pride often. Reaching his tipping point, he then vows to exact revenge upon Fortunato, though he is unsure of whether his desire to kill the other is based upon jealousy or revenge. Montresor proves to be a master of mind games as he successfully uses reverse psychology in order to continue to entice Fortunato towards the deep catacombs where his death awaited him. He appealed to the vanity and pride of Fortunato in order to ensure the success of his plans. This leads the reader to conclude that Montresor has a perverse mind that simply wanted to do Fortunato fatal harm even though he had not done anything within the storyline to deserve such a fate. Yet towards the end, we see that Montresor still has some control over his mental faculties as he senses guilt and remorse over what he has done to Fortunato. A man whom he knows truly has not done anything wrong to him except to be better than him in certain ways. Thus we see a man, psychologically conflicted and unable to deal with the results of his actions in his

Managing Change In Mcdonalds Company Management Essay

Managing Change In Mcdonalds Company Management Essay All organisations that wish to stay in the industry for a large amount of time all have to undergo change in different forms to stay in touch with and to cater to the always changing needs and wants of customers. Some very big examples are the constant promotional burgers that are present at different fast food restaurants such as in McDonalds introducing the Great tastes of America promotion, or Gillette bringing new shaving cream ranges and shaving blades. This constant change is to bring a new product to the market such that it will boost sales. In this report I will discuss different types of change and the background to change such as environmental turbulence and formal versus informal organisations. I will also discuss the strengths and weaknesses of the bureaucratic organisation and compare alternative forms of development in their different life cycles. In the second section of the report I will Identify and discuss the stakeholder analysis, develop and analyze approaches for involving appropriate stakeholders in change with the help of tools and systems such as multiple cause diagrams, functional and divisional structure, team development and cultural web. In the final section I will draw up a realistic plan for the realization of change models and their outcomes such as business process re-engineering, learning organisations, Kotters eight stage model which will be most helpful for an effective change of the organisation. I will base my review and analysis on the business of McDonalds and will refer to it regularly. My main analysis will be of a chain of franchises owned by Mr. T Eagle. Background to Change It is very important as mentioned in the introduction for an organisation to regularly introduce change in either management or in the structures and process of the business. This is because of constantly changing environment the business finds itself in. In these times of recession it is important for business to find ways to minimise costs and overheads as much as possible and thus large managerial changes have taken place to remove staff and increase the duties of existing staff as the duties of a few are delegated over a large number or people. This brings us on to the area of environmental turbulence. Environmental turbulence refers to the amount of change and complexity in the environment of a company. [Alexander P. and Daniel J. Power. (2004-06).] A significant change in environmental factors can be considered as advances in technology or changes in governmental regulations. As more factors are taken in to consideration, the level of environmental turbulence increases. For a chain of McDonalds restaurants, current environmental factors are economic recession, the increasing price of fuel prices and the increase in the government taxation policies. The economic recession means that people are spending less as the media has created a fear of a lack of money and therefore people will either eat at McDonalds as it is a choice of choosing the cheaper option or choose to cook at home. To tackle this, a change in the pricing of the food is necessary, and to encourage people to come to McDonalds by portraying an image that it is affordable. Due to increasing fuel prices, the cost of deliveries will increase steeply as will the cost of electricity, thus the overhead costs will increase and therefore a change is needed to tackle this problem. Finally due to the government debt constantly increasing, the only method of acquiring money will be to increase taxation which will affect larger businesses more than it would as compared to individuals and small busin esses. Ongoing change is also necessary to ensure that the strategy fits the structure of the organisation. There are many different types of structures that an organisation can adopt and the strategy that is employed must cohere with the structure to optimise the resources available, which if not the case can lead to underutilization and inefficiency. A formal organisation has advantages such that in a midlife or mature organisation, it helps to keep track and to have a log of actions and reactions. As there are many people, especially in a mature organisation, it is possible to have two individuals who do not converse such as the frontline staff in McDonalds and the regional manager, however in a formal organisation it is easier for the regional manager to see the efficiency of the crew member by checking his or her punctuality, length of breaks, and contribution from comments made by the observations from floor and shift managers. When it comes to changing the organisation it is possible to see who is a better asset in a position where they can be utilised more effectively as compared to someone who is not. An informal organisation is easier to change as it is based on implicit understanding on social norms, and therefore there can be a change in the organisation which can be discussed and put into action immediately unlike that in a formal organisation where everything must be passed down a chain of command which may take time which may prove to be inefficient. However an informal organisation tends to be at the birth or the youth of the business where there are a few people involved in the organisation and harder to imitate in a larger organisation. Bureaucracy is a form of authority using structures and sets of regulations in place to control activity. [Lecture notes, organisational theories]The advantages of a bureaucracy are that the tasks are pre-defined and coordinated such that if a change is brought in it will be easier to implement as it will be pre-defined and the new manager in charge will have to optimise carrying out the task. Also due to its precision, speed and un-ambiguity, it is easier to bring about change as it separates production and decision making such that a change in the middle management or even the upper management will not impact too much on the frontline team. However the disadvantages of a bureaucracy are that is discourages individual growth and initiative as all decisions pre-determined and therefore if a change is brought about in the organisation, each individual must undergo training to their new position and therefore it will increase the overhead costs. There is also a risk of goal displacement taking place which is an inbuilt tendency to focus on means and not ends. [Lecture notes, organisational theories]. This may lead to problems if changes in the organisation take place as it means that Tuckmans Team Development Model From Tuckmans Team development model [Lecture notes, stages of team development], the different stages of development are: Forming Storming Norming Performing Forming This is in the beginning stages of the life cycle and is where people are not committed to the team, there is not much trust and the individuals are not clear what they are supposed to do. To progress to the next step of storming, the group must set a mission and goals, establish roles and must build up a trust between figures. This is where each individual needs to decide if they wish to be a fully committed part of the team. Storming At this stage the roles and responsibilities are articulated and agendas are displayed, however problem solving does not work well and people want to modify the teams mission. Competition is high and people are pushing for position and power. Due to this there is little team spirit and anxiety abounds. To advance from the storming stage to the Norming stage, leader must ask for and expect results, as well as actively support and reinforce team behaviour. The team must buy into objectives and activities and must request and accept feedback. Norming At this stage, success occurs and the team has all resources for doing the job. Appreciation and trust build along with the fact that purposes are well defined. The members self-reinforce team norms and the team is creative. The team gains commitment from all members on direction and goal. To advance from the Norming stage to the performing stage, the team must praise and flatter each other, communicate all the time and share rewards. Commit time to team and delegate freely within the team. The team must also be selective of new member and train to maintain the team spirit. Performing This is the final stage in the team development and it is where members feel very motivated and individual defer to team needs. The team is very efficient and there is little waste and there is a high empathy, trust, openness and support. Individuals take pleasure in the success of the team and there is a big win. System Development The stakeholder analysis is present to address the issue of who is affected by the business and to win their support. When carrying out a stakeholder analysis it is important to identify the stakeholder groups; are they large or small; and how to win their support to carry out the tasks that a business or organisation wishes to carry out. By identifying the most powerful stakeholder groups you can shape your strategy in such a way which will allow you to gain their support. Stakeholder groups can be very large such as customers and employees or very small such as the chief executive or an important investor. Each stakeholder may have a different power which can be generally divided into four different areas; Position power Resource power Personal powers Expert powers Gaining support from powerful resources you can gain more resources allowing working more efficiently. Also involving stakeholders in change of the organisation is also beneficial as if you let them know your ideas and your plans early and they agree to the strategy, there is a likely chance that they will actively support you as they will understand the benefits of the change. It will also allow you to anticipate their reaction and allow you to make adjustments to your current plan of action to ensure that you win their support. [MindTool. (1995).] Targets not agreed and vague Low job satisfaction Staff employed on minimum wage Targets not communicated down the chain of command accurately Store targets not met Crew Members too friendly with the manager Store manager present for too long Not many chances of promotion for staff Store manager cannot discipline crew members as they have built a relationship Too many staff arriving late as no fear of manager Poor effort from crew members and middle-management Increase staff turnover and so increased training costs Low sales and poor service from staff From the Multiple cause diagram it can be observed that the problem here lies in the fact that the manager of the store has been present too long and therefore a change in the store manager will bring about an increased efficiency in the work force. Performance reviews will allow the store manager to make decisions on which employees to promote or give a pay rise to as it will encourage those employees to stay. Also the store manager should make clear the targets for all shift managers and floor managers such that they can also pass these targets on clearly, and so the targets of the business owners are met by all staff at every level. Thus the appropriate stake holders that would be involved are the floor managers and the crew. As they will have to respond positively to the change in the management, and thus the owner of the franchised McDonalds must address and communicate with all levels of staff and ensure that they understand why the change has been made as a majority of staff may be bitter to see the store manager leave. Other stake holders may include the technicians and engineers who have built a relationship with the previous store manager, and to encourage them to continue to work appropriately. The resources will be unchanged regardless of the change in store manager, and thus they will not be a major stake holder that will be approached prior the change. Implementation The current system of McDonalds is based on a regulated set of relationships, and the upper management in this situation are content with current targets and therefore will not strive to increase sales or address areas where work is needed. Interacting between the kitchen crew members and the front of house crew members is strained and the kitchen crew members feel underappreciated and cannot ask anyone for help and therefore there is a current lack of commitment to the business. Also there is no structure in the management of the McDonalds in question and therefore there are certain managers which will run around taking orders from crew members and other managers who will only shout if it is to get busy and take a very backseat role, leaving crew members unaided in times of need. EEmploy a Regional Manager which will look after the stores in one area to analyse where the problem lies in each store separately and to see how it can be improved. Analyse the strength of managers to see if their qualities can be utilised better in a different store. CChange the store managers around such that they will be managing another store in the chain. If there is a store manager that has proved to under achieve constantly then address the issue and either send them to a popular store or closer to the CEO office such that the problems the manager has can be observed. CCarry out regular crew development programs such that aspiring managers from the current crew can be noted and trained. Altering and changing relationships can only occur when there is a change in the management of the business to such an extent that current power figures are still seen as present powers, however even they should feel they are not free in the sense that they do not have to perform. Thus changing the store manager in this situation and allowing a regional manager to help control all of the franchises will help the CEO to keep a better eye on the restaurant. As the store manager has no relationship with the current team of staff, he will remain faithful to the CEO. Thus as the CEO has a divisional structure over his restaurants, he can change managers around between stores and therefore, they remain loyal and trustworthy to the CEO, which will mean there is a larger team that works hard for the CEO which he can rely on to boost sales. Also this will change the flow of information and allow the CEO who is also the owner of the franchise to gain the information of performances from staff from several different sources and therefore will be able to assess the management situation between his stores regularly. Thus it will allow the stores to be organised around outcomes and not around the tasks that are carried out. Also if parallel activities such as kitchen crew and front counter crew members are trained to carry out both tasks, it will allow the integration of results such that a larger understanding of the difficulties that either side experience. This re-organisation will allow the geographically dispersed resources to be treated as centralised and will allow the CEO to take decisions for his chain of franchises as a whole and individually much more clearly and faster, thus optimising results and in essence his profit. Kotters Eight Stage Process [http://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newPPM_82.htm] Create a sense of urgency A sense of urgency needs to be created inside the organisation. This is the first and most crucial step. The shift managers, the floor managers and even the long term crew members must want a change in the restaurant. Honest discussions must be made about which managers the crew and other managers feel comfortable working with and where is there a need to change the managers and if so how. Support must be requested by the regional manager to start the process for change. Creating a guiding coalition The leaders in the organisation must be identified in each store and these key people must be committed to the regional manager and support the change. Team building for change coalition is compulsory, and as with all great teams, there must be a range of different backgrounds and skills that each individual will bring to this team. Develop a vision and strategy Create a strategy for central values and vision and make sure that the coalition knows the change vision and believes in the vision such that they all believe that it can be achieved. The values are central for change and for the future of the organisation. Communicating the change vision The vision needs to be talked about often and it must be applied to all operations in the McDonalds stores and in the chain of command. The concerns and anxieties of each individual must be addressed and dealt with in the best and the most appropriate method possible. The change must be lead by example. Remove obstacles Identify or hire managers whose main role is to deliver the change. Reward and praise those who ensure that change is taking place and inversely identify those who are obstructing the change and either help them see what is needed or remove the barriers quickly. Generating short-term wins Create short term targets such as 100% scores on the gap buster, or improve sales on each day from last year, where there is little room for failure. After every win analyse what went right and where improvements can be made. Ensure that every win is rewarded. Anchor new approaches in the culture Talk of change success stories and in support of companys leaders. Include the change ideals when hiring or training staff, and ensure that key members of the coalition are recognised and their contributions are remembered. Finally creating plans to replace key leaders of change as they move on will help ensure that their legacy is not forgotten. Conclusion In conclusion, all organisations that wish to stay in the industry for a large amount of time all have to undergo change in different forms to stay in touch with and to cater to the always changing needs and wants of customers as I stated in my introduction. In my opinion, and using the evidence stated in this report, it will be most effective to improve results and to gain a larger profit to bring about a change in the business as it will increase efficiency and encourage greater team morale of all the employees. If the steps for bringing about change in the implementation are employed then ongoing change can be sustained if Kotters eight stage process is utilised.

Laughter as Therapy in One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest by Ken Kesey Ess

Laughter as Therapy in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest by Ken Kesey Laughter is a therapeutic form. In the novel One flew over the cuckoo’s nest by Ken Kesey laughter represents freedom and an escape from nurse Ratched’s restrictions. Laughter also proves a vital role in helping the patients deal with their problems. Not only does it help them deal with problems but it also gave them the push toward progress on getting out of the institution.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Mcmurphy was the one who started making people laughing in the ward. When he first came into the ward he was cracking jokes and shaking everybody’s hand. (p.16) No one in the ward responded with any real response but confusion. No body knew what laughter was in the ward, it was taken from them. The only thing they had was board games and Mrs. Ratched’s music (15). The ward was a very depressing place.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  When Mcmurphy comes into the ward his laughing was making people uneasy. This showed how far away the patients were from reality. The chief says (22) â€Å"I see he is making every body over their uneasy, with all his kidding and joking.† Then right after he starts connecting to the patients and the Acutes actually show some sign of a smile (23) â€Å"The Acutes are grinning now not so uneasy any more glad that something out of the ordinary is happening.† Only after 8 pages there is progress already seen in the patients with laughter.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚   Chief Bromden states â€Å"The air is pressed in by the walls to tight to let loose and laugh.† Before Mcmurphy arrives it is true. After his presence is recognized by the patients Mrs. Ratcheds grip over the institution starts loosing its hold. The first thing the patients do to start breaking her hold is start the gambling. They gamble for money even though it’s against ward policy. Little by little the patients show improvement with themselves it is portrayed by the ability not just to laugh but laugh at their own qualities. This occurs in the climax of the novel during the fishing trip (p215). When every ones lines tangle up and they start laughing at each other and themselves that is when they know that they aren’t really that crazy. They knew they were getting better. â€Å"They could sense the change that most of us were only suspecting; these weren’t the same bunch of weak-knees from a nut house.†Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚     Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Nurse ratched lost a lot of her power once the patients kne... ...y different reasons. Some people even laugh when something horrible occurs, it is a method of escape from what horrors or mishaps are going on around you. â€Å"Many psychotherapists find humor a valuable tool in helping their patients to solve their social and emotional problems.† (G. Samuel) Chief bromden was having many problems once he learned to laugh especially at him self he was mostly cured. He was considered a chronic but after Mcmuprhy showed him that he has the ability to laugh and coincide with a group he was some what cured. â€Å"jokes and commissions enable individuals to defend against anxieties, fear, anger, and other disturbing emotions.†(G. Samuel) This was true in the chief’s and Harding’s case. Both of them left the institution.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚     Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Laughing is resorted to in times where we need to laugh. It’s an escape from reality, its comfort, its fear. Laughing subdues any emotion that is too high strung in our system. It lets it vapor out in a melancholy form that helps us cope with problems that no one else can really understand and help us with. In One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest it allowed emotional tension escape from the patients and made nurse Ratched lose her ward.

Voice over Internet Protocol Essay -- VoIP Technology Networking Essay

Voice over Internet Protocol Definition of VoIP â€Å"Mr. Watson, come here, I want you!† These were the first words that were spoken over the phone back on March 10 1876. If you combine this invention with the same invention of the first computer that was completed nearly 70 years later in 1946, you would then be able to access VoIP. VoIP is also known as voice over internet protocol. VoIP is in essence the ability to talk with ones voice via computer to computer. In the next few pages you will learn about the history of VoIP, how it works, the requirements that are needed to use VoIP, the benefits and risks of this type of technology, and lastly you will get a glimpse at the future of VoIP. Not many people know what VoIP is or even that it exists. VoIP was designed to help with the costs for long distance charges. The idea or premise of this type of technology was conceived to use ones phone line and make a call through the Internet. It was designed to be used for both local and long distance calls thus cutting phone bill costs. The VoIP way of communication was started back in 1995 and was the result of work done by some hobbyists in Israel (Interangent, 2005). These hobbyists as well as other great inventors saw a good idea. Their idea was to be able to communicate through the computer as appose to talking over the phone. The idea was not so much to get away from the phone system but more to avoid long distance charges. In the beginning VoIP was only available when there was a direct personal computer to personal computer connection. Later in 1995 Vocaltec, Inc. released Internet Phone Software (Interagent, 2005). In the beginning it was fairly difficult to use. Due to the fact that in order to really be able to communicate using VoIP both the computers that were trying to communicate to each other would be required to use the same equipment, have a sound card and use a microphone. It was a good first effort, but as many firsts, the quality was very poor. VoIP would make great strides in the next three years. In 1998 VoIP had made such great strides that some companies were able to offer personal computer to phone services. The strides also were able to offer phone to phone contact. In the beginning VoIP did not charge their customers but chose to get payment through advertisements. When you made the phone call you would have to wait through an advert... ...base TechLand Group (2005). Strategies for Migrating Corporate Voice Traffic to the Data Network, Retrieved June 6, 2005 from the World Wide Web: http://www.techland.co.uk/index/page.index Try-three. (2005). History VoIP Article. Retrieved May 21, 2005, from the World Wide Web: http://www.try-there.com/voip/directory/history-voip.html Tyson, J. (2005). How stuff works. How voip works. Retrieved June 3, 2005, from the World Wide Web: http://computer.howstuffworks.com/ip-telephony.htm Voippreview. (2004). History of VoIP. Retrieved May 20, 2005, from the World Wide Web: http://www.voipreview.org/news.details.aspx?nid=51 Wagner, J. (2004, June 21). Networking. Retrieved May 26, 2005, from the World Wide Web: http://www.internetnews.com/infr/article.php/3371431 Webopedia (2005, June). VoIP. Retrieved June 10, 2005, from the World Wide Web: http://www.webopedia.com What Is (2005, June). VoIP. Retrieved June 10, 2005, from the World Wide Web: http://www.whatis.com Wikipedia (2004). Definitions in Technology. Retrieved May 26, 2005, from the World Wide Web: www.wikipedia.com Wikipedia (2005, June). VoIP. Retrieved June 11, 2005, from the World Wide Web: http://www.wikipedia.org

Interpersonal Communication Com 200

Communication in Interpersonal Relationships Benjamin M. Phelps COM 200 Mrs. Joyce Walther October 4, 2010 Communication in Interpersonal Relationships Today many people still lack the ability to communicate effectively with in interpersonal relationships. It is through cooperation and collaboration that effective communication occurs. By analyzing and studying the communication process we can improve our ability to communicate effectively between one another. To have a successful interpersonal relationship one must first interact with others, which is called interpersonal communication (Hybels & Weaver, 2007).Recognizing emotions in other is a very important first step to building a relationship. If you can’t feel what someone else is feeling then you can’t connect with them on a personal level and that can hinder your relationship process. Interpersonal communication is important because of the functions it achieves. Whenever we engage in communication with anothe r person, we seek to gain information about them. We also give off information through a wide variety of verbal and non-verbal cues. Verbal communication has huge effects on many aspects of life, including interpersonal relationships.Speaking and telling our needs and wants verbally or non-verbally is a necessity for daily life. Verbal communication is organized by language; non-verbal communication is not. Most of us spend about 75 percent of our waking hours communicating our knowledge, thoughts, and ideas to others (Allis, 2002). However, most of us fail to realize that a great deal of our communication is of a non-verbal form as opposed to the oral and written forms. Non-verbal communication includes facial expressions, eye contact, tone of voice, body posture and motions, and positioning within groups.It may also include the way we wear our clothes or the silence we keep. In person-to-person communications our messages are sent on two levels simultaneously. If the nonverbal cue s and the spoken message are incongruous, the flow of communication is hindered. Right or wrong, the receiver of the communication tends to base the intentions of the sender on the non- verbal cues one receives. Before a person makes an attempt to form an interpersonal relationship they must decide what attracts them to that person.There are many factors that make up attraction to others. Physical attraction, perceived gain, similarities, differences, and proximity are some of them (Hybels, 2007). Most people are first attracted to others because of the way they look. Some people might have distinct characteristics that one might be attracted to such as; blues eyes, short hair, or even a small space between their teeth. If a person is not attracted to your appearance they are not likely to come up and carry on a conversation with you.For example, if an individual, who dislikes tattoos, is taking a class and has to choose a partner for a project, but there are only two people left an d one of them has tattoos he or she will mostly likely choose the individual without tattoos ,even    if the person with tattoos is a very intelligent individual. There are many cases where we are attracted to someone because of the perceived gain associated them for example, one might become friends with an employee at a restaurant in hope of having discounted meal when they eat there.The similarities and differences are a major factor in determining if the relationship will be right for you. Often we find ourselves attracted to people that share the same beliefs, values, and religion. Most people are also attracted to people who enjoy the same activities as they do. Contrary to the similarities people may also be attracted to the differences. For example, person who doesn’t like making decisions might be attracted to a strong decision maker.Because these characteristics complement each other, they might help strengthen the relationship (Hybels, 2007). Proximity is a valua ble factor also when it comes to evaluating the pros and cons of a relationship. Proximity is the close contact that occurs when people share an experience such as at work, school, or play (Hybels, 2007). If a person does not want to have a long distance romantic relationship and their partner moves away to attend college in another state, then it is most likely that the relationship will not last.Moving on to the next steps of forming an interpersonal relationship would be our motives for communicating. We are motivated to form relationships for many different reasons such as, pleasure, affection, inclusion, escape, relaxation, control and health (Hybels, 2007). If an individual is motivated by pleasure he or she might just want someone to go to the movies or discuss politics with. Maybe we might be motivated by affection; many people are looking for someone to give them attention; a â€Å"pat on the back† or a little kiss every now and then.Many marriages end in divorce bec ause of the lack of affection from their partner, but if they could have communicated effectively to each other that they needed more affection the relationship might not have ended. No matter what might motivate us, once we have started developing a relationship we have to decide how much of our selves we want to disclose to the relationship and at what point in the relationship. Self- disclosure is a process in which one person tells another person something he or she would not reveal to just anyone (Hybels, 2007).Self-disclosure is not simply providing information to another person. Instead, scholars define self-disclosure as sharing information with others that they would not normally know or discover (Borchers, 1999). Self-disclosure involves risk and vulnerability on the part of the person sharing the information. Self-disclosure performs many functions. It is also a way of gaining information about another person. We want to be able to predict the thoughts and actions of peop le we know. Self-disclosure is one way to learn about how another person thinks and feels.Once one person engages in self-disclosure, it is implied that the other person will also disclose personal information. Mutual disclosure deepens trust in the relationships and helps both people understand each other more. You also feel better about yourself and your relationship when the other person accepts what you tell them. While self disclosure can strengthen a relationship it can also damage it. A relationship can be damaged if the person you are pouring your soul out to do not like what they are hearing or if self-disclosure comes too early in a relationship it can be damaged.Thus, while self-disclosure is useful, it can also be damaging to a relationship. There are five different stages that we progress through while developing and strengthening our relationships, these are the â€Å"coming together† stages. No matter what type of relationship it is; romantic, platonic, or same gender relationship each kind still goes through each stages. The first stage is the initiating stage. The initiating stage is characterized by nervousness, caution, a bit of hesitation, and risk of being rejected (Hybels, 2007).Although one might proceed with caution, this stage can be very joyful experience and the outcomes can be great. Most people leave this stage with a new friend. The next stage is the experimenting stage. In this stage people make an effort to seek out common interest and experiences (Hybels, 2007). One might express a love for children and hopes of being a parent one day. This would be an important topic to discuss for a romantic relationship; each person needs to be aware of what the future might hold for them if they continue with the relationship.When experimenting with each other by discussing important topics and seeing the reactions of other, one can make a valid decision based on their knowledge of the other person to continue the relationship to the next stage. The intensifying stage is the third stage that we go through. Self-disclosure becomes more common in the intensifying stage. The relationship becomes less formal and statements are made about the level of commitment each has to the relationship. In this stage individuals might have nick names for one another or â€Å"inside jokes†.A statement about attending a vacation next summer in France is an example of the commitment one might have for the relationship. But while self-disclosure becomes more common and makes the relationship stronger it can also make the participants vulnerable to each other. The integrating stage is the fourth stage. This is the point where personalities are beginning to merge; people are expecting to see them together (Hybels, 2007). The individuals become a pair. They begin to do things together and, importantly, others come to see them as a pair.A shared relational identity also starts to form in this stage. By the end of this stage indi viduals should know how to communicate and responds with ease and understanding of the other person’s feelings. The final stage of coming together is the bonding stage. At this point, the participants make some sort of commitment that announces their relationship to those around them (Hybels, 2007). Two girls friends might say they are now â€Å"best friends† to announce their comment to their relationship or a couple might announce they are getting married or buying a house together.This stage involves a lot of commitment and dedication to the relationship and to each other. In all of the stages discussed we all have decision to make. We can either progress forward to the next stage, stay in the same stage we are in, move back a stage or exit the relationship all together. No matter what we as individuals choose to do we need to know how to communicate effectively to that next stage and we need to know how to handle conflict or resolve conflict in our relationships.We can do this by conflict resolution, which is negotiating to find a solution to the conflict (Hybels, 2007). Depending on how a conflict is resolved it can produce a positive or negative result. For example if two sisters are fight over a dress to wear on the weekend, they have two choices: one wear the dress and the other one does not, which leaves one sister unhappy (negative outcome) or neither of them wear it, so both are satisfied and neither of them are jealous of the other (positive outcome).It also helps to take a positive approach to conflict resolution, where discussion is considerate and non-confrontational, and the heart of the matter is on issues rather than on individuals. If this is done, then, as long as people listen carefully and explore facts, issues and possible solutions properly, conflict can often be resolved effectively. In short, interpersonal communication is just like any other works of life, it must be practiced and utilized regularly in order to be succe ssful. We must continually analyze and study it in order to improve our ability to communicate effectively in relationships.   That will lead to better relationships which lead to a better life, both personally and professionally.References Allis, R. (2002). Non-verbal Communication. Zeromillion. com. Retrieved September 25, 2010, from http://www. zeromillion. com/business/management/non-verbal- communication. html Borchers, T. (1999). Interpersonal Communication. Allyn & Bacon. Retrieved September 22, 2010, from http://www. abacon. com/commstudies/interpersonal/interpersonal. html Hybels, S. , & Weaver, R. (2007). Communicating Effectively. New York: McGraw-Hill